Sick Fakies

Brackchips and I met up with a bunch of other dudes for a few spring training ball games around Tampa Bay this weekend. Let me tell you, this weekend was epic. We learned several things, including:

1) Our friend Bobby would do a dude under the right circumstances

2) I'm like 8x better than Brackchips at predicting people's scores on the boxer game at the bar

3) Neither one of us can break 65 mph on the gun at the ballpark

4) We already knew this, but Phillies phans are disgusting 

5) Tampa has a ridiculously high percentage of surgically enhanced breasts

Much like last year, this year's trip featured some pretty thin eating decisions. Here was the weekend menu for me:

-1 Bojangles chicken biscuit meal

-3 Philly cheese steaks

-2 cheeseburgers and fries

-2 McDonald's sausage biscuits

-2 Chick-Fil-A chicken sandwiches

-2 rarge srices of pepperoni and sausage pizza

-many buffalo wings

Crushed it all. We also got in some action at the casino Friday night. Unfortunately, due to some ghey Florida state law, you can't buy into any poker game for more than $100. Doesn't matter if blinds are 1/2, 2/5, 5/10...$100 is the max. So we played some 1/2 for a while since at least there we could have 50 bbs as opposed to 20 or 10 at the other games. Brackchips won some money, I rost as a result of what I'd say was mediocre but not terrible play by me and some bad ruck.

I didn't have a bad time, but it definitely confirmed my belief that playing online is much better. First of all, the rake at the 1/2 game is 10% of the pot, capped at $5, which is nutso. I think at Full Tilt it's 5% capped at $3 or something. Plus you've got to burn a dollar or two tipping the dealer any time you win a decent pot. Then you've got to deal with all the retarded table talk. I had one hand where I raised a loose limper with JJ, got a call on the button from a standard but somewhat loose player, and then a call from a tight player in the big blind. Flop came 952r and I got check-raised all-in by the tight player. Even with my 50 bb stack, I ended up folding. I probably would have folded anyway, but after I had been thinking for a few seconds, he started saying things like, "what you got, K9 over there? pocket eights?", at which point I instamucked. He hemmed and hawed a little more after the hand and told Brackchips that he had pocket deuces. I told him what I had, but he wouldn't believe me. He was firm in his belief that I had "nothing". When I asked him why he raised given that he thought I had nothing, he just got kind of a dumb look on his face. 

Then the guy to my left had to give a running commentary on each hand, interspersed with tales of his bad beats from earlier in the night, as well as how many millions of dollars his friend had made playing tourneys online. Whatever. Maybe his beats were bad, and maybe his friend does pwn online. I just couldn't care less. Despite me giving off ZERO vibe of wanting to hear more, out it came. 

Towards the end of the session I raised the same roose rimper with KTo, got called by the chatty guy on my left, and Brackchips re-raised from the button. I briefly considered a move but laid it down since my ghey stack would have required him to call my shove with any two. Then Chatty goes into the tank, after a while turns up his cards - 99. He's got like a $120 stack, Brackchips had re-raised my $10 bet to $25, so I'm pretty sure showing his cards that early in the hand is not optimal. Finally he folds and grumbles to me, "he had at least two overcards, I mean he's not gonna re-raise you and me with nothing...", and I'm thinking...buddy...you have no idea... My favorite part was early on Chatty asked if Brack would show if he forded. Brack said he'd do it for $5. Then later after showing his nines he asked again and Brack said, "price has gone up, now it's $6!!" Unfortunately the donk folded and did not cough up the dough for the show.

-BRUECHIPS